Unlike what mainstream media might be portraying, the world of BDSM is extremely varied. The same goes for Dominance and submission relationships, as these come in lots of different shapes and flavors. If you think that you might be a submissive but aren’t sure about the details, check out this guide to find out what kind of a submissive you might be.
Bedroom subs in BDSM
One of the most common types of submissives is a bedroom sub, which is a person who wants to be dominated only during sexual interactions and not outside of the bedroom. Naturally, Doms in these cases only have temporary control of the sub, which ends after sexual interaction is over.
A round-the-clock submissive is someone who relinquishes control to their Dominant on a permanent basis both in and out of the bedroom. In a 24/7 Dom/sub relationship the sub has certain rules and expectations imposed on them which they are supposed to follow at all times. This can include behaving or speaking in a certain way, performing domestic and sexual tasks, etc. This power dynamic may or may not be noticed by people outside of the relationship.
Unlike most other submissive categories on this list, service subs and Dominants have exclusively non-sexual relationships. Instead, the sub services the Dom by performing household duties and other chores that are agreed upon by both parties.
A pet submissive is someone who likes to pretend that they are a furry animal such as a kitten or a bunny and a pet of their Dominant. It’s common for pet subs to make animal-like noises, crawl around on all fours, wear a leash, etc. It’s also common for pet subs to use sex toys that have animal tails, such as butt plugs.
Slave submissives in BDSM
A Master/slave is a very extreme version of a BDSM relationship where the Master often has complete control over all aspects of the slave’s life, including sleep, food, speech, etc. All the details and rules are typically discussed before the start of a Master/slave relationship.
Babygirl submissive in BDSM
This type of Dominance/submission is misunderstood very often because a lot of people believe that it resembles pedophilia. This is not correct, as the relationship is between two adults and the motivations between two people in such a relationship are psychologically very different from pedophilic relationships. Subs who identify with a specific age of a young child are often called littles, while subs who don’t have a specific age but simply display child-like behavior are called babygirls.
Frequently asked questions about BDSM and types of submissives
What are Dominance and submission?
Dominance and submission are a type of sexual interaction where one partner assumes the role of a dominant, while the other partner assumes the role of the submissive.
Are BDSM relationships abusive?
Normal BDSM relationships are never abusive - they are relationships between two consenting adults who agree to engage in Dominance, submission, sadism, bondage, etc. by choice because it’s something that both partners enjoy. In fact, trust, communication and safety are extremely important to people who engage in BDSM.
Are men always dominant and women always submissive in bed?
While in most cases the man acts as the Dom or top and the woman as the sub or bottom, it doesn’t have to be that way. A woman can easily be a Dom or switch between two roles and a man can be a sub or a dom. D/s is also common in homosexual relationships.